feel the heat?

I tried making fried rice today. FAIL!!! cause for some reason, i thought that light soya sauce didn’t give me the colour, i imagine fried rice should be.so i mixed in a little dark soya sauce. I got salty rice. I was so pissed, i wasted a batch of rice… had to cook another batch of rice and prepare the ingredients all over again…and the heat was unbearable.

Today, managed to see ethan. His 3rd month today. He can go out now…yay. but today we(naomi and me) brought him downstairs for a bit… he got cranky cause he was hungry i guess. He’s getting so cute!!! Baby strollers are ridiculously expensive…but it makes life so much easier.

Anyway, our much awaited online shopping spree together was fun. Though it was a pain in the arse to find a powerpoint for the laptop…seriously,fast food chains should have powerpoints but then again, you’d see more people hogging the seats.

We bought quite a few stuff.Contemplating on my very very nice lomo camera that I saw online. Online shopping is like evilly addictive.

I’m so tired…from last night’s left4dead session…. but always fun as you get better at the game.

its not fair.

the last few days, i found comfort in you… its not fair that you left. Leaving me a text on how you hate saying goodbye. I’m sorry I didn’t give you a reason to stay. I taught things were going fine, why didn’t you tell me everything was not okay. I could have tried my best to help you…

I hope you’re coming back and I hope you’d give me a call wherever you are.

I guess we really won’t know what we’ve got till its gone.

P.S. I’ll miss you too…

To see you when I wake up
Is a gift I didn’t think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do
Is a three-fold, Utopian dream.

You do something to me that I can’t explain.
So would I be out of line if I said “I miss you”?

I see your picture.
I smell your skin on
The empty pillow next to mine.
You have only been gone ten days,
But already I’m wasting away.
I know I’ll see you again
Whether far or soon.
But I need you to know that I care,
And I miss you.

maybe i’m better than that…just maybe.

after talking it out and thinking it through. I still don’t know what i want from you if i ever talked to you again. Do i pretend nothing happened the way you do? Should i still talk things out with you? Are you even gonna talk to me? Got to admit, this is the first time you hurt me damn fucking bad. everything is just becoming worse, cause it hurts to know that you’re just there to talk to. But i’m hoping that you’d make that first move. to sum it up, things will never be the same again and its killing me.

You took my hand,you showed me how
You promised me you’d be around
That’s right
I took your words and I believed
In everything you said to me
Yeah huh,that’s right

If someone said three years from now
You’d be long gone
I’d stand up and punch them out
Cause they’re all wrong
I know better cause you said forever and ever
Who knew

Remember when we were such fools
And so convinced and just too cool
I wish I could touch you again
I wish I could still call you friend
I’d give anything

When someone said count your blessings now
‘fore they’re long gone
I guess I just didn’t know how,I was all wrong
They knew better
Still you said forever and ever
Who knew

I’ll keep you locked in my head
Until we meet again
And I won’t forget you my friend
What happened

If someone said three years from now
You’d be long gone
I’d stand up and punch them out
Cause they’re all wrong and
That last kiss,I’ll cherish
Until we meet again
And time makes it harder
I wish I could remember
But I keep your memory
You visit me in my sleep
My darling,who knew
My darling I miss you
My darling Who knew

shoppin’

thanks to dearest naomi, I’m addicted to shopping online. Its like a disease that spreads and i hope i’ll be able to stop myself from buying stuff before i’m dead broke. Can’t help it. Anyway we were at parkway, we bought cool bags.(no, its cooler than you can ever imagine), bought clothes for ethan and ate sushi. bought gifts for them, because naomi spoils me with cute small stuff, out of the blue. Got to see Ethan today(naomi and ramon’s baby), the beanie naomi chose was perfect for him. he’s just so adorable.Priceless smile.

thats him at 1 month..

thats him at 2 months plus…..he’s growing…..fast!=)

Protected: what i saw

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quotes

‘I promise that this will be the last time you’ll see me. I won’t come back. I won’t put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if I’d never existed.’

Edward Cullen, New Moon, Chapter 3, p.71

‘As much as I struggled not to think of him, I did not struggle to forget. I worried—late in the night, when the exhaustion of sleep deprivation broke down my defenses—that it was all slipping away. That my mind was a sieve, and I would someday not be able to remember the precise color of his eyes, the feel of his cool skin, or the texture of his voice. I could not think of them, but I must remember them. Because there was just one thing that I had to believe to be able to live—I had to know that he existed. That was all. Everything else I could endure. So long as he existed.‘
Bella Swan, New Moon, Chapter 4, p.116

“It didn’t feel like the pain had weakened over time, rather that I’d grown strong enough to bear it.”
Bella Swan, New Moon, Chapter 4, p.118

like finally

spot me!!and the rest..

call to arms

Please tell me where you are
‘Cause I just cant find this all again(Take it all back)
I’m not sure how this turned out right

I’m trying today
I’m lost in a way and I’m sorry

*its not getting easier.if only my mind would stop wondering…

the sense of deja vu.

the last time I lost sleep its because of you. This time again. I’m up all night.2 days in a row. I’m not even tired.  I don’t know why this affects me so much, it shouldn’t. Talk about me making your life emotionally difficult.argh. Why do you frustrate me so much!!??!! I find comfort in talking to people, meeting them these few days, anything to keep my mind off you and the things you said. But everytime i’m alone…like right now, my mind just keep playing the messages you sent.

I hope your life is much better now, without me.

Would you trade me for more,
Of yourself when it’s silent.
Try not to give too much,
So you won’t grow tired.

And I know you,
The good and the bad,
The days I recall being wonderful.
And I lost you,
And I held it back,
Please tell me that everything will work out fine.

Pictures taken fast,
The proof that I know you.
In albums stuck to bleach,
But memories they’ll keep.

And I know you,
The good and the bad,
The days I recall being wonderful.
And they lost you,
And I held it back,
Please tell me that everything will work out fine.

If this is the last dance,
Then may I have it.

edited.

He smokes like an amethyst
Moving his way through my skin
He moves me
Cause East is the way I go
But nobody seems to notice how I feel
Keep all the lights off
And I’ll try to kill our past time
Just to find your heart
Please dont ignore me
Or I’ll just fall asleep
And wake up when you’re gone
This body only needs
To learn to feel the problem disappear
I froze with those plastic eyes
Cutting lose from upon this disguise
He smokes like an amethyst
Moving his way through my skin