Archive for March, 2008

28
Mar
08

how amazing it feels just to live again….

memories.

when i started out poly… i was constantly jamming with the ex’s friends

and yesterday, rather this morning, they picked me up at 2am.

drank red bull and in the midst of being loopy, we decided to go to Darren’s dad’s music store. It had like a jamming room(just for Darren) who hardly uses it.

So we got keys.and we were sneaking in like a bunch of buglars cause the security officer was walking around.

I wanted to just watch them play and mess with the drum set. then they played blue and yellow, i went up to sing.

it was like old times all over again. then all the covers we ever did in the past, just for fun, came out.

they got latest gossips about the ex. all tonight. can’t wait.=)

Countdown:8 days.=)

And it’s all in how you mix the two,
And it starts just where the light exists.
It’s a feeling that you cannot miss,
And it burns a hole,
Through everyone that feels it.

Well you’re never gonna find it,
If you’re looking for it,
Won’t come your way,yeah
Well you’ll never find it,
If your looking for it. (looking for it)

Should’ve done something, but I’ve done it enough.
By the way, your hands were shaking,
Rather waste some time with you.

And you never would have thought in the end,
How amazing it feels just to live again,
It’s a feeling that you cannot miss,
It burns a hole, through everyone that feels it.

Well you’re never gonna find it,
If you’re looking for it, won’t come your way, yeah
Well you’ll never find it, if you’re looking for it. (looking for it)

Should’ve done something, but I’ve done it enough.
By the way, your hands were shaking.
Rather waste some time with you.

Should’ve said something, but I’ve said it enough.
By the way, my words were faded.
Rather waste some time with you.

(Time with you… time with you time with you
Waste some time with you… waste some time with you)

Should’ve done something, but I’ve done it enough.
By the way, your hands were shaking.
Rather waste my time with you.

Should’ve said something, but I’ve said it enough.
By the way, my words were faded.
Rather waste my time with you.

Should’ve done something, but I’ve done it enough.
By the way, my hands were shaking.
Rather waste some time with you.

Waste some time with you…
Waste some time with you…
Waste some time with you…
Waste some time with you…
Waste some time with you…
Waste some time with you…
Waste some time with you…

(fading)
Should’ve done something, but I’ve done it enough.
By the way, my hands were shaking.
Rather waste some time with you.

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28
Mar
08

Just for today…..

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24
Mar
08

you’re killing me!!

I’ve been looking through old photographs…

Time passes so god damn fast. as far as i’m concern i wanna be stuck at the age of 19 forever.

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Vickesh was the cutest baby ever….

I can’t help but feel bummed out these days cause i don’t have the time to talk to people and i don’t think they’ll have the time for me. the last i heard, the ex went clubbing with his new fling and it ended pretty well for them. and that was the night…I wanted to drink my life away…I wanted to.

my heart can’t take it anymore.

21
Mar
08

If I could run away,right now…I would…

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Cause I’ve lost my confidence…trying to make love work. Trying to move on when he’s almost everywhere i go.

Just when I thought the ex didn’t want to see me ever again, after i saw his face  holding another girl’s hand, he called, we met….

he made me overcome my fear of cats today. Almost everyone i know, knows i hate cats.

And I wanted to find the courage to talk to Mr. K today. but i couldn’t. I stared at his profile for damn long thinking I could send him a message saying hi and telling him that we should definitely meet up again. I couldn’t. I couldn’t match up to his standards of girls.  I was way beneath him in many ways. I found myself crying just now , where the fuck has my confidence gone to?

And then the band guy shows his concern.

Reality.

It sucks.

Try being me, my life is not all great and glamorous.

And this is just the beginning of all my problems.

So don’t say your life is just fucked up.

Put on twice your weight….and then tell me how fucked up your life is.

15
Mar
08

Thinking back…

I recently met up with my secondary school classmates. Two of them in fact.Been in contact with them on and off eversince I left school. I can’t believe like how much we talked, gossiped and reminisce over half the things that happened in school.

As much as I hated the teachers and the damn system of the school.  My friends/ classmates made it hell of a ride back in secondary school. I admit that life is better now cause back then my freedom was in the pits. But hell lot of memories.

I actually went back to my school last Wednesday. I just looked into the classrooms. Trying to remember where all my classrooms were…where I used to sit during recess. Where we used to skip classes at.

School was the best during lower sec days. I remember vandalizing the  tables, walking around school aimlessly, being carefree after exams(we could do whatever we wanted), cleaning classrooms, designing classroom walls, chasing teachers out, camps (orientation camp was the best), socialising.

After that school became a bugger, change of principal, teacher’s start being a bitch, detention(famously known as RTC), classmates start framing other classmates(which lead to suspension for some of us), losing good friends, fights etc.

That’s when I got pissed with the teachers, I nearly got retained at sec 3, teachers started looking down on a group of us, which pissed us off, Sec 4 I turned around with the motivation of few of my classmates and a certain someone back then.

Lead me to becoming one of the top in my class. And by then I had changed my friends, changed over-all. That teachers had their tongue-tied. I remember one of the teachers, who used to pick on me during my lower sec days, came up to me and said, “I heard you’re doing very well, congratulations.”

Lamest thing I got :most improved conduct award(at the end of Sec 4)

and I’ll never forget the other friends I made along the way, who are now my bandmates, who helped me set the band up.

At the end, the memories were still good. Sha has been always there for me from then till now.

And I believe what someone told me is true, “the friends you make in secondary school are the ones who will always be TRUE friends.”

And all the other friends I made after that, are probably why I’m still living it up right now.=)

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09
Mar
08

Till the day I get the courage to talk to you…

you will always be on my mind.

And today you’ll be anonymously known as Mr.K

*i’m not in love.fools. 

08
Mar
08

before I forget..

My trip with Su to london pics are up…Su has them on her online album.

http://picasaweb.google.com/casualtyofsociety/LondonCalling

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I missing them.=/