18
Oct
09

Please pardon my language, i’m hormonal.

I’m superbly irritated these few days  for many little reasons. I was cramping like crazy today. I couldn’t find the remote for the fan and messed up my room looking for it. My parents decided to have guests over when they told me that we couldn’t celebrate deepavali this year. yesterday a colleague drove me up the wall, that i went straight to the assistant manager to whine. The noise level of the guests in my house earlier on, irritated me, i decided to take a walk by myself several times.facebook irritated me. the phone irritated me. the laptop irritated me. my parents irritated me. Certain group of people i used to know irritated me..

I wish to point fingers right now. but i know i won’t have anything nice to say. and i don’t want to hurt anyone right now. Like I’ve said before, if I won’t forgive them, then God will. cause unintentionally they have hurt me. Cutting those people out of my life would be the easiest right now, but its really hard. cause I’ve shared many good memories with them, for those 3 years. So I’m doing it slowly.Then once I’m done, I can safely say that poly life, those 3 years, was nothing special and exceptional.

Anyway, Wednesday is my judgement day. I hope that the scan turns out normal and the doctor would not remind me of how I might have cancer.And though I have this nagging feeling that nothing is wrong with me, it scares me to know that I was thinking of holding off treatment till few years down the road. I would have cut my life by many years if I did that.I tell you its not easy being a woman cause we are the more paranoid ones. and its proven that we are the first to report symptoms compared to men. After all that, I was thinking….Even if I do have cancer, I think thats when I’d start living my life to its fullest, and I think its gonna be fun. =)

On a happier note…

my special one has been my strength. I can tell him anything and he always has something to say to comfort me. I couldn’t ask for better company.I’m glad he doesn’t frustrate me as much as he used to. And I’m confident to say, he’ll be there for me if things were to go downhill.=)

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