Archive for the 'complain' Category

29
Sep
09

Dear diary, my angst has a body count.

alcohol and left 4 dead is a good thing.

playing l4d while intoxicated is just love.

if only i was a bum, no job, nothing.I’d spend every waking night intoxicated and playing left 4 dead till i die of liver cirrhosis and blindness.

stupid numbskull.

I have grown increasingly patient, its amazing.

HOWEVER, i’ve become increasingly frustrated with ONE person. and i think she knows who she is.NEVER CHANGE i tell you this person, wasted my breath.

I’m gutting you out, does this make you feel safe?

Anyhooo, i’m not in love, dumbfucks.

just endless amount of infatuation. I feel like a silly small girl, dreaming of many things that involve him.

oh, perfect one.

” i haven’t lost anything, except my mind….”

23
Aug
09

such rage you could scream the stars right out of the sky.

A lot of people say don’t waste your time getting angry. But i think its okay to get frustrated with the people you care about so much. Because you unconciously set an expectation for them and when they fail to meet that expectation, you get frustrated.

Several times, recently, I felt unappreciated and used. And I’m sure many of you know it feels like shit.

Time and time again, I told myself that forgiveness is the only way to achieve happiness. But how many times can you really forgive and forget? What happens when “sorry” doesn’t mean a thing anymore? What happens when statements your friends make all seem fake and its all lies to you? Is the trust really gone?

At the end of it, you question, are they really your friends?

I might be getting a bit paranoid, but this is what happens when your friends have been backstabbing you many times.

He bends and he breaks
If he gives they will take away
His passion, his pain, his grace

He exhales,
A thousand black flowers explode
Into butterflies as they’re away

Rip them out, take them,
Burn to coals as they crush and leave nothing
That resembles a soul of a man
See him numb, see him crushed
Rip them out, take them
Burn to coals as they crush and leave nothing
That resembles a soul of a man
Leave them numb, leave them crushed

Took the fire inside
One too many times
He’s burning over and out now,
He flails
Up against the raging tides,
No more fights
Everything you ever wanted to see,
See it in his eyes
One more time

Climb down to test the waters,
My hands feel like they’re rusting away
So I’ll pace around like a lamb before the slaughter
I’ll stay here as long as you let me,
Decision’s been made obvious so I will return
Where I started I’ll stay here
When I’m finished I’ll whither away

13
Aug
09

its just another day right?

i was asked this question…if there was one person in the world i would want to spend the day with…who would it be?

the first thing that prob came to your mind was some big shot celebrity or something.but I was thinking of the people closest to me. And that one person would be the person i included in my tattoo. I would spend the day, trying to show him that things are always not what he perceives and that there are more things to life than his comfort zone.

I was thinking of all the things i would be doing with him…but i realised that my birthday is gonna be another ordinary one. living my day to the fullest.

Anyway, the bronchitis is killing me, esp the antibiotics…cause now i have this metallic taste stuck to my tongue and mouth. Its disgusting. I hate being this sick.

15
Jun
09

things are gonna get better.

positive vs negative

the battle in my head

13
May
09

frustration

its not worth my time. if you’re not bothered to put in the effort, so am i. two can play this game, this very wicked game.=)

14
Apr
09

Please…just let me…

bang my head against the wall for being gullible and stupid.thanks.spaceball1408163640_670eacaa1c

keep thinkin’ bout that little sparkle in your eye
Is it a light from the angels, or your devil deep inside?
What about the way you say you love me all the time
Are you liftin’ me up to heaven, just to drop me down the line?

There’s a ring around my finger,
But will you change your mind?
And you tell me that I’m beautiful,
But that could be a lie

Are you a heartbreaker?
Maybe you want me for the ride
What if I’m fallin’ for a heartbreaker?
And everything is just a lie
I won’t be leavin’ here alive
I won’t be leavin’ here alive, no

Temporary happiness is like waiting for the knife
Cause I’m always watchin’ for someone to show their darker side
So maybe I’ll sit back and just enjoy all this for now
Watch it all play out, see if you really stick around

But there’s always this one question
That keeps me up at night
Are you my greatest love
Or disappointment in my life?

Are you a heartbreaker?
Maybe you want me for the ride
What if I’m fallin’ for a heartbreaker?
And everything is just a lie
I won’t be leavin’ here alive
I might as well lay down and die

I’m holding on with both hands and both feet, oh
Promise that you won’t pull the rug out from under me

Are you a heartbreaker?
Maybe you want me for the ride
I pray to god you’re not a heartbreaker
This time around I won’t survive
Cause if I’m fallin’ for a heartbreaker
And everything is just a lie
I won’t be leavin’ here alive
I might as well lay down and die, oh
I won’t be leavin’ here alive

11
Apr
09

stupid gullible shit

disappointed again. what the hell is wrong with you. go tie a fucking noose around your neck and kill yourself. who gives a shit about you. not him. you’ve got to realise that.